User blog comment:Vorred/Patriots - Feedback Blog/@comment-958607-20130710011048

Chapter 1 was something of an interesting twist, having the action of the Prologue be replaced by storytelling. It really highlighted the action of the first installment and, as far as I can tell, was a nice contrast. :P It does wonders for your establishment of your story and, as Artek the crazy one pointed out, that re-imagining of the BIONICLE opening with the Toa Stones in the sand was a very nice touch, particularly with the Skakdi prisoner telling the story instead of some old Turaga. It's a very unique angle to take and totally changes the perspective from the traditional story. :P I'm planning something similar for Zero Hour, mixing BIONICLE with Shakespearean elements, but I don't think my version will have as much symbolism as you did in this chapter. :P

The Skakdi himself is a fascinating character. He seems very shifty and has something of a disturbing presence. "Stranger danger!" was going off in my head when he appeared. XD He genuinely seemed creepy and unnerving, which I thought was great. :D We haven't had a silent and informative Skakdi in the canon story and this one is an interesting character to include. I would like to see this village get expanded and to learn what he did in the first place. :P

This did take me a couple of read-throughs to fully understand, but I love the idea that there are three mystical Toa instead of the Great Beings. :P It provokes much anticipation for the identity of the Toa to be revealed. :D

Overall, another good chapter that I loved reading. :D I'd like to see more of Falecía, Andron and Pirai, as well as Brorag and Merall, but I suppose only time will tell. :D