User blog:Jefforyduck/Critique call please

This is my thing now, a sort of check on myself. I feel like my articles and stories are starting to fall apart. If you catch my drift.

So tell me how my stories are doing. But not Dark Tornado, because I'm putting that one on hold.

links:

The Odyssey of Rannok

Fun in the Sun and a Robot's Body

Just some constrctive criticism, please.

Thanks.