User talk:Matoro58

Characters
Sorry, I'm going to have to say no to some of them. :/ My characters are only in a position to appear in your story line exclusively in the Deserts of Death universe, and I'm not going to rewrite that. I would prefer that you did not use Tethys as it was created by Karabak, who was only ever on Bara Magna in the Deserts of Death universe for a currently unknown reason. It doesn't exist in any other universe. However, you can use an alternate universe version of Lothorna, though I wouldn't include her on Bara Magna as she and Jex only went there in the Deserts of Death Universe. At the moment my efforts are focused on rebooting my current story in the Fractures Universe Arc. If you had any ideas you wanted to use my characters for I'd be very interested to hear about them, but Jex is owned by User:Ids5621, he just let me mention the character. So, I'm going to have to say no to all of them on this occasion. I'd be happy to lend a helping hand with guiding your story's direction though. :P

Additionally, since this may put a huge spanner in the works of your story, I'd be happy for you to use some of my Agori characters. I've compiled a list of Agori characters in my storyline available for use. If need be, you can use Shylock, Betak and Eselox in addition, but I would prefer it if you did not kill those three off. Furthermore, Cromata has recently been revamped, though he lives on Bota Magna.

I hope this compensates. :)

Thank you, that's very kind. :D I'm sorry this didn't work out the way you'd planned, but I'd be happy to help you kick start your own BIONICLE fan fiction story and I'm very pleased that you've been reading the Deserts of Death era of my story arc. Personally, I think anything I wrote before 2010 was horrific so I'm quite touched that you went to the effort to read my story. :D

Yep, I'm happy with most of that. :) Any story detailing the pasts of Eselox and Lothorna I'm happy with, but remember Lothorna can't be on Bara Magna. :P

In the majority of universes, Mudro was exiled and banished into the Wastelands. I don't know if that would be of any use to you. If it is, there's more information on his Canon BIONICLE Universe page. Either way, I'm in full support of anything you can contribute to Mudro's and Juulant's lives on Bara Magna. :D

The business with Toa Santis concerns me though. He's a very specific character, but I know you're going to use him wisely with him dimension-hopping. So long as you don't try to reveal anything about his origin (that much has to stay a mystery until he finds out in the final chapter of Falling in the Black) then you should be fine. Also he can't have the sword, knife or cape as he acquired those in the Fractures Universe. Aside from that, good luck. :D I also took some inspiration for him from the Mata Nui character and from Thor, the MARVEL comic hero.

To add an image you find "Upload Photo", on this page. You click "Choose File" and select the picture you want to upload (so long as it's saved on your computer) then give it a name in the "Destination Filename:" section (e.g. "BtD27_Toa_Tollubo_Fractures_Universe_Form_03"). Then you can ignore the summary section (it's mostly there for if you want to add the image to a category immediately after uploading it) and just click "I took this photo myself" in the final drop box menu. Any further help can be found here. :)

In regards to the Pouks article, it's got a lot of interesting content. :P It needs a little bit of tidying up in places and the infobox you've used dominates a large chunk of the page, but I'd be happy to help you write it. :) I've been writing the Kualus (Fractures Alternate Universe) page recently, and there's a lot of stuff from that (probably up till the who Fractures Universe part of the story takes place) where his past was quite similar to Pouks'. :P Maybe Pouks met Tollubo on Karzahni and the pair were buddies. XD That would be an interesting twist. :D

Wikify
I'm sorry, but I'm going to assume you need assistance with the page you just created.

It's very little as I've said, but feel welcome to PM me if you need the assistance.

Thanks, (talk)

Re:Pouks and Fractures Crossover
I'm very pleased that you're reading those two particular stories as I think they're the two weakest in the Fractures Saga and I'm currently rewriting them in the Fractures Universe Rewrite because I am displeased with them. To hear someone tell me that they are good chapters is exceptionally good to hear. :D

I'll have a look into writing a story about Pouk's Matoran past, but it would have to be a short one, about the same length as The Kingdom. I'm planning a short story featuring Jollun's origin which I could perhaps include Pouks in. Seeing as Jollun (in his reboot form, not as he's previously been seen) is a creation of Mata Nui who exists to protect Matoran in times of need, he could save Pouks. As Jollun is reincarnated as a mythical, legendary hero for Matoran in all universes, this story could take place in absolutely any reality at all, so long as his existence is kept secret. :P

I'm currently working on Juulant's Pre-Mutation form I've painted a helmet specifically for it. But, for the moment, just imagine her looking like this, colored green, armed with a similar spear and with silver accent colors.

As for Mudro, in the Main BIONICLE Universe? No. He was dead loooooong before then. Remember, he was dead for 65,300 years before Tarduk found his corpse and buried it, which obviously took place a few centuries before the current BIONICLE story. I'd say he's been dead for around 74,000 years in the Main BIONICLE Universe. Depending on which universe this story takes place, I'd be happy for you to use him. You could perhaps have a chapter where some characters appear and save him from the Bone Hunters, thus preventing his death. :P

Ah, changing his Kanohi is going to be a problem. :S It's really needed for his origin to work. Couldn't you find a way for him to keep the same Kanohi? It does have 3 very useful powers in one mask. :P

I'm going to have to say no to that, unfortunately. I'm in a rush to get my stories finished before the end of summer. I still have to write Judgement Day, which is going to be my longest story serial yet. I don't think I'll have time for a side story. I'd prefer that you didn't get things mixed up with the Falling in the Black Characters, but you're welcome to use Tollubo while in Karzahni, though he must be in this form.

Yes... I did like Roodaka. As a matter of fact she was my favorite female character in the BIONICLE story, with close competition between Nokama and Helryx. I did not, however, make Racasix entirely out of pieces of Roodaka. Racasix is an entirely separate creation, which was my first and only attempt at creation a hyper-feminine creation. I kept key elements of Racasix in mind while building Racasix as there are no other Vortixx creations with which to base her off. I tried to dampen down the femininity of my Vortixx females in Hollian.

Thank you. :P How about... "Degeneration", "Midnight Sons" or "Evil Evolution" all come to mind. Having Lothorna as a victim of Karzahni is an interesting concept, and a plausible one too. Ce-Matoran are usually peaceful and quiet. With Lothorna being so violent and disruptive it's a wonder she wasn't sent to Karzahni in the first place. :P Do you want to build her VoyaToran/Fixed Form or shall I? :P

But remember, all the Toa Hagah came from various different islands and/or settlements. Varian came from Norik's settlement so it's quite unlikely that Pouks would have come from there too. :P

Mudro's not the person who's supposed to take a sip when he sees the caption. :P He makes the reader of the page into an alcoholic by taking a sip every time he looks badass. :P

I'm glad I could be of help in this early stage. :P I'll give Lothorna's fixed form a shot over the next week or so. I've been painting a number of Kanohi in Metru-blue lately while I have the right combination of paints. How does a Metru-Blue 2008 Hau Nuva sound? :P

He was indeed on Voya Nui but he was known for constantly trying to find ways to get off the island and failing in this period. Additionally, Karzahni remade his missing hands very poorly and they were notoriously heavy. He often had to drag them alongside behind him and was made fun of on several occasions. Additionally, his Kanohi was one which Karzahni looted off of a Toa Hagah, an Elda in the shape of an Avohkii. That might be of some use. :P

Hmmm... You could have Levita or Krennato as insane Turaga but I'd prefer that the sanity of Vilnius remained intact for the time being. :P But the wonderful thing about having an alternate universe is that any Toa or Matoran could fill the role of that insane Turaga. :P It could be Ahkmou, or Balta, or Dekar, or Nuju or Tuuli. (and so on...) :P Goll was sent to Karzahni by Vilnius at one point because he kept undermining the grumpy Turaga.

All the rest sounds good so far. :P You have the makings of a good cast rostrum there. :D

In regards to Tollubo's sanity, that's an issue that has caused some confusion in the past. :P Tollubo sometimes thinks of himself as being insane and often talks to himself inside his head in italics, which is suggestive of a split-personality, but he isn't insane. In fact, when he wants to be, he is an excellent marksman, an extremely skilled tactician, and can use Elemental Powers, which require severe concentration and mental integrity. Whenever he talks about being insane, it's not meant to be taken seriously. It's just a running joke of his. :P

In this instance I think it's best to stay to tradition in that a Hau Nuva is a Hau Nuva. I recently created a custom Kanohi for Kualus. Would you mind if I just reused that Kanohi for Lothorna and called it the Mask of Sensory Aptitude? :P

For Nidhiki, I believe his pre-fixed mask was a Volitak so I'll suggest that. :P

Sounds good, but I'm actually working on a story from Tourik's perspective at the moment that will take some time. If you include him I'd prefer that you made him quite a negative and sarcastic character, but the story serial I'm doing will make that easier to understand. So, yes, you can use him, but make his appearance as brief as possible please.

Erm... Matoran can't reproduce at all as far as I'm aware. I was breaking the upper limits of romance in Matoran when I put marriage in my story. But I suppose if you're setting it in a universe where Matoran reproduce then there wouldn't have been any need for the Red Star to save the dead population. You don't need to ask me permission if you want to use marriage in a story, just use it wisely. :P

Similarly with the beer drinking, having a Turaga drunk could be funny if you pull it off right but, again, you don't need to ask me for permission to use it. I don't own the rights to usage of either of those in a story. XD

OK, I've read the fourteenth chapter of World of Hell but, I must confess, I haven't read the previous chapters so I'm still a little confused as to why the Matoran Universe guys are on Bara Magna but, at the same time, it's an alternate universe so I suppose anything can happen and I can't really pick fault in that. My only concern is why Sidorak, Radiak and Vezok decided to come. That sounds a bit vague.

Furthermore, I'm seeing a lot of similarities to my own storyline here with a Makuta being imprisoned under the surface of Bara Magna, which I find a little questionable. Regardless, I would be interested to see how Makuta Jiirka pans out and evolves as a character.

Additionally, it has been established that Nektann was a Skakdi of Water as opposed to Plant Life, though I'm not sure if you've mentioned this to me before as one of the key differences in this universe. I personally think that it's a little unnecessary and makes the story slightly less plausible.

Additionally, there is a lot of narrative when Nektann gives a very in-depth description of Jiirka. Now, I'm all for the use of descriptive language, but, in this case, having a character explain a situation rather than showing it is considered bad storytelling. This is something that Shakespeare was often criticized for. However, in this case, it's not nearly as bad as you would think. My only issue is that Nektann is so biographical in his description. It's like he's quoting from a textbook. Perhaps if you changed this into a more conversational delivery, or just have it all written down on a stone tablet that Nektann throws at Pouks.

Similarly, Jiirka goes on an entire monologue, explaining why she was in this state to the assembled figures. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't do that if I was a Maktua who'd been trapped underground for thousands of centuries. I'd rip their guts out then misuse my Teleportation powers to sneak into a cinema. XD Again, I think that the autobiographical content of her monologue needs to be toned down. Remember, these are her first steps on the surface, her first glimmer of warm sunlight, her first breathe of air thousands of years into the future for her.

For a single chapter, there's a lot of dialogue, and like I've said, the autobiographical nature of it is the main weakness. But there's a lot of good in there too. :P It's an interesting take on the Bara Magna social system to have the Fire Tribe join the Skrall.

Keep up the good work. :P

is my little brother. He hasn't been an active member of this site for years. He came here to help me set up my MOC empire on this wiki but didn't make a large contribution and left. He has no intention of returning and no intention of getting involved with the community. Thus, he did not want a user page. Jollun is his self MOC so I guess he felt it was appropriate that anyone looking at his page thinks of him as such.

It's just BIONICLE Reviews Wiki, and so long as you stay within the bounds of what is appropriate, sure. The Wiki is pretty much dead and I don't intent to return to it anytime soon, but I still watch over it.

Message
Hello, Matoro58. I'd just like to give you a minor warning regarding your recent edit to the talk page of TROMBONE TWISTER. Please don't insert gibberish into pages, be it a user page, talk page, mainspace page, or any type of page - it's considered spam. Sure, it was a subject matter of an April Fools' joke, and you can feel free to still message TROMBONE TWISTER, despite the fact that I really don't log on to that account anymore, but regardless of the circumstances, please don't spam any page.  Shadow master    (Contribs)   03:26, May 1, 2013 (UTC)

It is indeed the same story serial. All is explained in my most recent blog post, User blog:BobTheDoctor27/March 2013 Update.

Glad you read it, and that's exactly what it is like. :D Toa Tourik's Guide to the Fractures Alternate Universe (TTGTTFAL) is a guidebook/introduction for new readers to my story. It explains everything that has happened thus far, as well as some of the key differences between the Fractures Universe and the rest of the multiverse. :P

However, it's not a story as such, more a case of me writing in character as Toa Tourik, with the odd sarcastic comment or negative remark. It's laid out pretty similarly to the BIONICLE: Dark Hunters guide in that it describes key figures in the Fractures Universe history, including Toa Jovan, Prozuke, Vormahk and Autolycus, who will be in Zero Hour.

Before the Dawn, however, is a short story. :P It's a recycled plot that I've been mulling over whether or not to write since I introduced Tourik and Gribrak but I've finally decided to do it, and it will be released with the Guide. :P

I started writing it today but, Frozen Calling is my main priority at the moment. The Guide will probably come out towards the end of the month. :P

Anyway, I must go now as it's 1am here in Britain and I have a History exam tomorrow. Night night. :P

Yep, I'm fine with that. :D

I'm reading the chapter at the moment and all looks good. :P The only thing I'd change is the fact that there's a lot of short paragraphs of only a few lines divided up by ***

I would perhaps try bulking up each paragraph and cutting the story in two as a second chapter. Other than that, I can't wait for it to take off. :D

OK, when writing a page I break the character's history up into a number of sections. Let's use the Tourik (Fractures Alternate Universe) page as an example. Emmediately I start with the origin of the character on Spherus Magna, then make it clear which island is considered their homeland. In this case, the Mainland Swamp in the Southern Continent. A new section tells the reader that he became a Toa at some point, and another introduces one of his earliest known actions as a Toa.

I always find that having a character go off wandering the Matoran Universe is useful. Tourik, Glonor and Thode are great examples and it really helps to enrich the character. Maybe they start off on the Northern Continent but wind up on Stelt to stop a mugging. Perhaps they travel in search of Artahka and end up owning a business in Metru-Nui. They could spend some time kicking back amongst Matoran on a pastoral farm on the Northern Continent. The Matoran Unvierse has tonnes to offer, and thousands of possibilities. Maybe Esnidar went on a world-tour before settling down and saved Balta's life at some point. Maybe he learnt a life lesson from watching Mahi or discovered a new type of plant in the Southern Island Chain. You just need a bit more about his early life, and to exaplin more about what he did in his later life as a Toa, where he started killing Matoran. (Though, for killing that many Matoran, I'm sure he'd either be sent to the Pit or assassinated. He wouldn't be held in stasis.)

The Bara Magan section concerns me as there's a lot of "they travelled here and met this person then went over here and shook hands with a Rock Steed". If you don't have anything to say about the character then just shorten it to "after a number of jounreys around Bara Magan, he acquired a small team; composed of Sidorak, Radiak, Desnirca, Vezok....."

I'm fine for you to still feature Santis so long as you don't try and uncover anything about his past.

However, given the implausible nature of his Kanohi, I'm considering getting rid of it and just making it a Mask of Clairvoyance, instead of being 3 Kanohi in one. As a reader of my story, do you think this would be a good idea?

OK, whether or not it will make a good story isn't very clear. You've described a pretty good setting to me and painted a picture of a scenario, but it doesn't seem like you've planned out the direction of the story. What character development is there? Who's the main villain? What challenge does the hero face? What is the significance of the "unknown male Makuta" and his role in future?

As for Santis' Kanohi... no. I'm afraid that's not happening. The Mask of Undeath would give him too many masks and it's just not worth changing the character. If you want to make a character wearing a Mask of Undeath then you should do that before changing an existing one. :P (I'm sorry if that sounded blunt but I just don't want you changing the creation so drastically like that) :P

OK, there are some good ideas there but a lot of them are far-fetched and a little ridiculous, especially the one with him disguising himself as a Po-Matoran.

Thode's Team is Kualus' old team, and I would prefer it if you tried to limit the number of links to my storyline. I'm going to have to say no to this as I want Thode's/Kualus'/Gorta's original island to be left ambiguous, the way the canon story intended it to be.

Also, I'll need to see a picture of this Toa of Lightning to check exactly how much she was inspired by Thode. If they're too similar then you'll have to credit me and Thode in the Trivia section on her page.

Yeah, that sounds a lot more solid, though I think I can see slithers of influence from Karabak and Tiam in there, which I thought was a similarly robust relationship and I would love to see expanded. :P However, the killing of the Toa of Iron and Magnetism wasn't done by just one Makuta, and it certainly wasn't frowned upon by the Brotherhood's leaders. Plus, remember Zaria murdered one of the Makuta who tried to kill him during the Purge.

This sounds a lot more developed than it was previously. Just flesh it out into the form of a story serial and continue to develop it. :P

I'd be interested to see both this Toa of Lightning and the Makuta build for Girdis as well.

Additionally, please note that you don't have to add a new heading with every message. :P It's kinda filling up my Talk Page quicker than it should. Also, please end you messages with --~. It will create a link to your page, which would mean I don't have to go track down your page each time when I want to reply. :P

Well, there's a very simple explanation for that... I lied. ;)

A lot of writers do that to protect their secrets during the writing process. :P Initially, I'd only planned on having the Toa Metru appear after Glonor jumped out of the exploding Airship, but it was an opportunity, and one that I took advantage of at that. :P

Regarding Glacii, a great deal of ambiguity surrounds his death, but I don't think I agree. In giving his life he redeems himself for his sins. By putting himself through all that torment he undergoes a process of spiritual cleansing and is ultimately forgiven in Glonor's eyes. :P

Who says we won't? ;)

There's a lot of ambiguity surrounding Glacii's "death" and we never find out if he was destined to be transformed by the Energized Protodermis. :P Plus, I am bringing a couple of new Toa into creation to bolster the ranks of the Toa Metru in the second half of Judgment Day. :P

Well, exactly what role could he have played? :P He was only a pawn in the grand scheme of things and had his time as Metru-Nui's greatest threat in Frozen Calling. :P He's not going to get more than one opportunity like that. Plus the fact that he's dead and Tollubo has decided to stay in the Fractures Universe justifies my decision to leave him there for the rest of the story. :P Plus Fractures Tollubo's handiwork will live on the impact the DoD Tollubo in future. :P But, undeniably, you do raise some good points. Initially I had no use of Fractures Tollubo in J-Day. :P The main villain is going to be the female Makuta/leader of the Cult of Darkness. Anything else was going to be up to Mudro and Gorta. :P

I will reveal that there is a reason why Glonor didn't see Glacii's demise. :P Just two days before I posted the full thing I considered adding a small Epilogue about Glacii being teleported away and saved by Tren Krom. :P

I like to think he'll come back to haunt us. ;) After all, Jaller and Matoro came back from the dead. :P